A Motherfucking Starboy

First up, while its still January (and not that awkward to), lets wish everybody a Happy New Year. Happy New Year you all.

hny

2016 has been rough, people. Both for this planet and for this blog. Which is why I’ve decided to take up blogging again in 2017.

And what better way to do that than by showcasing my ultimate deafness on the interwebz.

If you have a social life/internet connection I’m pretty sure you’ve heard Starboy by The Weeknd at least 50 times already. I know I have. But even though I kinda like this song and its on my morning commute playlist, I CANNOT FOR THE LIFE OF ANYTHING UNDERSTAND THESE LYRICS TILL NOW. I honestly do not know what this song is about. Could be about not giving a fuck about Bella Hadid. Or Selena Gomez. Or about cars because I have a vague memory of hearing that somewhere. But then ever since we found out that I Can’t Feel My Face is about cocaine, you cannot blame me for not trusting this man with song meanings.

Anyway I’ll stop bullshitting and move to what the post actually was about. Here goes my first misheard lyrics of the year. Clearly the stuff in italics is the actual lyrics. Also, video for reference.

The Weeknd & Daft Punk – Starboy

I’m tryina put you in, you wuss, smooth out

(I’m tryna put you in the worst mood, ah)

Pee went cleaner than your church shoes, ah

(P1 cleaner than your church shoes, ah)

Nearly .2 just to hurt you, ah

(Milli point two just to hurt you, ah)

All bread and lamb just to tease you, ah

(All red lamb’ just to tease you, ah)

None of these toys on lease too, ah

(None of these toys on lease too, ah)

Made your whole year in a week too, yeah

(Made your whole year in a week too, yeah)

Main, main out with your leak too, ah

(Main main out of your league too, ah)

Side, side tryina do a leak too, yeah

(Side side out of your league too, ah)

House so empty, needy Santa pees

(House so empty need a centerpiece)

20 rocks on table cut from a bunny

(Twenty racks a table cut from ebony)

Cut that iron into skinny pieces

(Cut that ivory into skinny pieces)

Then she clean it with her face while Imma bathe

(Then she clean up with her face, man

I love my baby)

You talkin’ money, need to hear Renée

(You talking money need a hearing aid)

You talkin’ ’bout me I don’t see the shame

(You talking ’bout me I don’t see the shade)

Switch out my Psyduck to any lane

(Switch up my style I take any lane)

I switch out my code, fuck it let me play

(I switch up my cup I kill any pain)

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha

Look out, you’re dumb

(Look what you’ve done!)

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha

I’m a motherfucking starboy

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